Mind-DriverÕs_Education

A woman heard of a dangerous situation while listening to a traffic report on the radio. She immediately called her husband on his cell phone and said, "Honey, please be careful ! The radio says that there's some nut driving the wrong way on the freeway." Her husband anxiously replied, "It's worse, there are hundreds of them going the wrong direction."

Laughing, when I first heard this, I was reminded of the times that I've been wrong about something and believed it was everyone else. I also recognized the many lessons that driving has taught me about life and the way I think about things.

No matter how much we want to, we do not control other people's cars. It would seem obvious that it is a waste of energy to think we could control the way other people drive. It would also seem obvious that if we don't like the way a driving situation is developing, then we need to the one to slow down, change lanes, or steer clear. Yet, how often do we feel responsible for other's feelings or try to change other people's behavior ? Our energy is better invested in focusing on how our behavior is contributing to the situation at hand.

My high school driver's education instructor told us, "Sure you may have the right of way. But if you demand that you are right, you may just be dead right." How frequently have we proven ourselves right by making someone else wrong ? The usual outcome of making someone wrong is to damage the relationship. By yielding the right of way (understanding the person's point of view and their right to hold it)

with empathy, we are more likely to both safely interact and maintain respect as a foundation to the relationship.

If we continually find ourselves running into the same situations and problems, we may be driving bumper to bumper at high speed. Slowing down our thinking, choosing empathy over judgment, and authentically feeling our feelings and then choosing our responses are all ways of maintaining a proper distance. Maintaining a proper distance offers us the ability to see the big picture, time enough to respond, and ways to avoid conflict, crisis, and stress.

No matter how far we drive in the wrong direction, it's never too late to admit it, turn around and go back. While most mistakes are life changing, few are a matter of life and death. It is our willingness to learn from them that determines whether it is a growth experience which enables us to make a better choice at the next opportunity.

Remember when we first learned to drive and how tightly we held the steering wheel. If the car drifted to the right, we would immediately steer abruptly to the left. The results was that we were usually all over the road. Yet, with experience we learned to hold lightly and the car would travel smoothly by our allowing the wheel to move easily though our hands. It's a wonderful reminder of the paradox that letting go is usually a vital part of being in control of a situation. Recognizing the natural flow of a situation helps us avoid overreacting

When skidding on ice, we are told to turn into the direction of the skid and refrain from slamming on the brakes. This offers the image of the benefit of meeting a problem head on and avoiding erratic behaviors that will cause the situation to become worse. Sometimes the best action is to pray and ride it out.

Life continues to offer us a wide variety of experiences. The road, we travel is at times uphill and filled with twists and turns. At other times, we roll smoothly along seemingly without a care. Yet, it's always an adventure. Enjoy your journey.